Installing a Home Security System


1. Go to the Goodwill Store and buy a pair of men’s used work boots, size 14-16.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with several scattered empty beer cans, a copy of a well-thumbed Guns & Amp, ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

—“Hey, Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim — I went to the gun shop for more ammo. I’ll be back in an hour. Don’t mess with the pit bulls: they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don’ think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood.
—“P.S. I locked all four of ’em in the house. Better wait outside.”

Source:ย  Old Horsetail Snake

Blogged with the Flock Browser

2 thoughts on “Installing a Home Security System”

  1. ROTFL!!!

    Came across your post through Google Alerts, which I use to track industry news, and clicked through, expecting a serious installation guide (particularly since the Alert mentioned the work boots… I was thinking, okay, here we go…) – totally blown away by the post instead. The people at the coffee shop where I’m writing this were staring at me… ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Oh well. If you do need a home monitoring service at some point, do drop by our site at – easy and free. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Regards from Singapore,

    – Varun.

  2. Hello Varun:

    I’m sorry if I pulled your leg. When I read it the first time I also though it had something to do with security cameras. Instead I got this giggling message. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Thanks for commenting.

    Regards from Panama,


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