Do You Think Puns Are Funny?


Puns are used in the American culture to have fun. If you are new to the English language, I’m afraid you won’t laugh much, since words used in puns do not have a literal meaning. You must be familiar with the colloquial speaking of the English language to understand the comical meaning of the pun.

You may ask; what is a pun? A pun is a variety of a usually humorous play on words involving the multiple meanings of an expression, or two expressions that sound similar. Many English teachers agree that “the ability to make and understand puns is the highest level of language development”.

An example of a specialized pun is an antanaclasis. What is that? An antanaclasis is a pun in which a word is repeated with a different meaning each time. For example: “Your argument is sound, nothing but sound”. (Benjamin Franklin, cited by Corbett 1971 482 ) or “”If you aren’t fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm.”—Vince Lombardi.

To help you further understand puns, I’ve selected 25 funny situations involving puns. If they mean Japanese kanji to you, please seek help from an English speaking friend, or consult a pun dictionary. Then you can go ahead and laugh to your heart’s content. Here we go.

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

4. A dyslexic man walks into a bra…

5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.”

6. “Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The Green, Green Grass of Home.’”
“That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.”
“Is it common?”
“Well, It’s Not Unusual.”

7. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.” “I don’t believe you,” says Dolly. “It’s true, no bull!” exclaims Daisy.

8. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

9. Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.

10. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn’t find any.

11. A man wakes up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouts, “Doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!” The doctor replies, “I know you can’t—I’ve cut off your arms!”

12. I went to a seafood disco last week… and pulled a mussel.

13. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

14. Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, “Is the bar tender here?”

15. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, “I’m sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.”

16. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says “Dam!”.

17. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.

18. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says “I’ve lost my electron,” The other says, “Are you sure?” The first replies “Yes, I’m positive.”

19. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

20. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why?” they asked, as they moved off. “Because”, he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”

21. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named “Ahmal.” The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him “Juan.” Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, “They’re twins! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal.”

22. These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to “persuade” them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he’d be back if they didn’t close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

23. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (oh, man, this is so bad, it’s good)… a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

24. There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

25. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”

Now you can go to your friend’s parties and deliver your own puns; thus making them happy and healthy. Good Day! 😀

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5 thoughts on “Do You Think Puns Are Funny?”

  1. Hi Don:

    Puns are an excellent source of humor. The only problem is you need to know the language. For a person studying English they are extremely hard to understand.

    This happens to me a lot and I often have to use the dictionary to decipher what’s going on that everybody is laughing.

    Cheers,

    Omar.-

  2. How is #10 a pun? The word “camouflage” isn’t used in a punning way. It is simply a whimsical to think that the camouflage is so effective that the purchaser can’t locate it in the store.

    It reminds me of that song “Ironic” by Alanis Morisette where she details a number of situations, none of which are ironic. Perhaps she is really clever and was shooting for the meta-irony, but I doubt it.

    Took make up for the hole in your list, here is one I made up recently:

    My wife learned to cook in alimentary school.

  3. Hi Jim:

    Thanks for your clarification. As I said, puns are really hard to understand if you are new to the language. Your pun is right on the dot.

    Best Regards,

    Omar.-

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