Joke: Jesus is Watching You


A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around, looking for valuables; and when he picked up a CD player to place in his sack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying, “Jesus is watching you.”

He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head, promised himself a vacation after the next big score, then clicked the light on and began searching for more valuables.

Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, “Jesus is watching you.” Freaked out, he shone his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.

Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot perked on the top of a cage. “Did you say that?”, he hissed at the parrot.

“Yep,” the parrot confessed, then continued, “I’m just trying to warn you.”

The burglar relaxed. “Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?”

“Moses,” replied the bird.

“Moses?”—the burglar laughed. “What kind of weirdo would name a bird Moses?”

“The kind of weirdo that would name a Rottweiler, Jesus,” loudly squawked the parrot.

Did I get a chuckle from you? Good Day!

2 thoughts on “Joke: Jesus is Watching You”

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