An Urban Safari in Panama City, Panama

In Panama, November 28 is a national holiday.  The country proudly celebrates its independence from Spain in 1821 under the leadership of Simon Bolivar.  It is the last independence holiday of November.  Then the country gets ready for Mother’s Day, Christmas Day and our course, New Year’s Day.  A lot of social action lies ahead.

Since there were no parades scheduled in Panama City, my wife and I decided to visit a popular mall located on the outskirts of the city—Albrook Mall. The place is huge, fully covered, and air-conditioned.  There are so many things in there, it’s almost impossible to decide on what to buy, unless you have it explicitly written on a piece of paper.  That is what we did.  My wife wanted to buy a new pair of sneakers for her daily early morning walkabouts.  She was crazy for a  pair of New Balance rubber shoes.  So that was exactly what we wrote on a white sheet of paper—New Balance tennis shoes.

Our beloved grandnephews—Abdiel and Carol— jumped into the bandwagon.  We called the trip, the Safari Mall Trip because the mall was full of wild animals.  The owners of the mall–very cleverly—identified the structure with wild animals which matched a certain color.  That would help the shoppers to easily identify and find the shops they were looking for.   For example, if you were looking a Mac Store to buy an iPhone, you would look for the Penguin Corridor identified with the color yellow.  The number is PA-P12.  At the entrance of the mall, you can request at the Information Center,  the Albrook Mall Store Guide to avoid getting lost.

The supposed purpose of the trip was to shoot fourteen wild animals at the mall.  The kids would be the  guides and I would be the hunter with my loaded Birthday camera.  My job was to shoot all 14 wild animals.  My wife’s mission was to buy her shoes, but that’s another story for another day.  

Below are images of several wild games we were able to find and shoot with my Canon PowerShot A720 IS camera.  Relax, take a deep breath,  and enjoy.  Here we go.

Abdiel and Carol pose with two zebras at the entrance of Albrook Mall. The zebras are all dressed up in Christmas colors. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

This is the second game of the day---a very tall giraffe in the middle of the aisle. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

An enormous dinosaur from Jurassic Park, so tall that my wife and Abdiel are barely visible. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

Carol is about to be eaten by a Christmas hippo. Abdiel and my wife Aura watches close by. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

A splendid capture of an African elephant. It looks almost real, except for the size of course. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

Photograph of papa and mama kangaroo. They look so cute in their pink pigmentation. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

I was strongly attracted to these dolphins swimming together with other fishes and turtles. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

My wife Aura isn't afraid of this gigantic King Kong. He looks menacing if you ask me. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

A beautiful family of Arctic penguins lovingly embraced by Abdiel and Carol. Even penguins feel cold, notice their scarfs. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

In this picture with a panda bear, Carol is beginning to feel the weight of walking several miles all over the mall hunting for wild games. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

Wow! This Bengal tiger really looks threatening. These feet are meant for running. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

Abdiel is acting awkwardly after having this powerful rhino behind his back. He looks as big and powerful as a Sherman tank. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

During our urban safari, Abdiel and Carol meet the King of the Jungle. Carol poses like a Carnival Queen under the wild beast. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

On our final capture, Abdiel's batteries are almost dead, while Carol has renewed her energies. (Credit: Omar Upegui R.)

After a safari that started at 10:00 a.m. and ended 04:30 p.m., we accomplished our mission.  With the assistance of my savvy young guides I was able to shoot fourteen wild animals.  Tired and dragging our feet, we headed home with a big smile on our faces.  We had a perfect hunting score.

Oh, one more thing…my wife got her walking shoes.  She was also smiling on our way home.   That makes four smiling faces heading back home.    Ain’t that nice?  Good Day.

Read Full Post »

Joke: Endangered Species

A forest ranger is making rounds in a remote part of the wooded reserve when he comes across an unkempt man, sitting at a makeshift campfire. To the ranger’s horror, the man is eating a fish and a bald eagle.

The ranger arrests the man and puts him jail. He is brought before a judge the next morning.

The Judge asked the man, “Do you know that eating a bald eagle is a federal offense?”

—“Yes I do,” replied the man, “but please let me explain what happened.”

—“You may proceed.”

—“I got lost in the woods, and hadn’t had anything real to eat for two weeks,” the man explained. “I was so hungry, I was eating plants to stay alive.”

—“Then one day, I arrive at a lake. I see a Bald Eagle swooping down to the water and flying away with a fish in its talons. I thought, ‘if I startled the Eagle, maybe I could steal the fish.’”

—“Low and behold, the eagle lighted upon a nearby tree stump to eat the fish. So, I picked up a rock and threw it. I meant to hit the stump and startle the bird. I hoped he would drop the fish and fly away.”

—“Unfortunately, in my weakened condition, my aim was off. The rock hit the eagle squarely on his poor little head, and killed it. I agonized over what had happened, but I figured that since it was dead I might as well eat it.”

The judge says he will take a recess to analyze the defendant’s statement. 15 minutes pass, and the judge returns.

“Due to the extreme circumstances, and because you did not intend to kill the eagle, the court will dismiss the charges.” The Judge then leans over the bench and whispers, “If you don’t mind my asking, what does a bald eagle taste like?”

“Well your honor, it is hard to explain. The best way I can describe it is that its much more tender than a California Condor, but the meat is bland compared to a Spotted Owl.”

Good Day and stay away from endangered species. 

Read Full Post »

Joke: Bear Hunting

Steve was excited about his new rifle and decided to try bear hunting. He spotted a small brown bear and shot it. Right after, there was a tap on his shoulder and he turned around to see a big black bear. The black bear said, “That was my cousin and you’ve got two choices … Either I maul you to death or we have sex.” After considering briefly, Steve decided to accede to the latter alternative.

Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Steve soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip where he found the black bear and shot it. Right after, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him. The grizzly said, “That was a big mistake, Steve. That was my cousin and you’ve got two choices. Either I maul you to death or we have rough sex.”  Again, Steve thought it was better to cooperate.

Although he survived, it took several months before Steve finally recovered. Outraged, he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the grizzly and shot it. He felt sweet revenge, but then there was a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to find a giant polar bear standing there. The polar bear looked at him very sadly and said, “Admit it, Steve, you don’t come here for the hunting, do you?”

Good Hunting, I mean Good Day.

Read Full Post »